You know that when you ask Jesus into your heart and life that the hard work begins. The process can be slow for some things and some sins you can lie down and never look back on them again. Some people you walk away from and others you run to and tell them about this glorious change in you. You lose some of your past mentors that were mentoring you in bad things and you gain new mentors, angels, that help lead you down the path that you have chosen. The path of peace, love, eternity and also some pain and strife.
You go through your days casting the old you aside and working to be more like Jesus. You want the change to be instant. You want everyone to see that halo over your head. You want everyone to see how great your life is with Jesus in it. But it doesn’t happen that fast. At some point you may even get discouraged and think that you haven’t learned anything. You may think that you aren’t trying to walk Jesus-like you are just a sinner wearing a mask.
Then one day down the road you are sitting somewhere and something happens. Something that would have triggered bad behavior in the past with you. You notice that it doesn’t affect you the same way. For a few fleeting moments you see Jesus in the mirror instead of your face. You become filled with joy and love. You have done it. You have, if even for just this instant, shown the world around you that Jesus is in you!
It is these small milestones that start to add up and create the new you. The person that shows love, compassion, grace, humility. Soon you realize that you are pretty strong in your Love Walk. When you started you were all sinner now you are Jesus’, still a sinner but redeemed.
These last couple of days I have been struggling with the person that I use to be. I am a very in your face, call it as I see it person. The Lord has been working with me on this for longer then I care to admit. I need him to work extra special hard right now. Because sadly I really am having the hardest time holding my tongue. Unfortunately for me I am pretty good at being blunt, vocal and scalding with my mouth. I will even admit that there was a time where the hurt I caused didn’t bother me because I was stating the truth. The only reason that I admit to this particular shortcoming is that I haven’t had any issues for the last couple years. Now I have two friends that are being beaten up on but other people and I really want to rip those people to shreds. So I am praying for Jesus to continue holding my tounge.
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Jesus Is Still Working On ME~~I Pray!
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5 comments:
Natalie and I talk about this often. The same traps I used to walk into freely, I can now see them in advance and turn directions. THAT is proof that HE has changed us.
We just gotta keep casting off the old. Hard, isn't it?
But maybe Jesus is telling you to not hold back and jump in. That is always the hard part for me, what is He really saying
Praying for you too. It's hard letting our old nature DIE!!
As Beth Moore says, "You are no longer a THAT, you are THIS!"
This is something I really struggle with too... because sometimes we are called to hold our tongues... and sometimes we are called to speak forth in boldness. It's always difficult for me to determine what to do when. But "He's still working on me" too!
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